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Re: Readers Digest: (Score: 1)
by married2sonofhoarder on Sunday, February 11, 2007 @ 09:54:10 ICT
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I got my Reader's Digest in the mail today and this was the first article I read! I immediately got on the computer and went to the website and also looked at the trailer for "My Mother's Garden."

My mother in law is a serious hoarder but thankfully she doesn't have any problems with rodents, feces or animals she can't care for. She actually spends much of her afternoons and evenings "churning" her stuff around. We have been wondering what the heck to call it when she moves it from one place to another and churning is very appropriate!
We are very worried about her and as she gets older, its becoming worse. Her husband is an enabler and just doesn't want to make waves. The windows are never opened, they have sheets stapled over them so that nobody can see through the blinds! She used to keep the piles to the side of the living room so that we could all sit on her sectional couch. Now part of the couch is in the garage and rest of it is completely covered with stuff. There is room to walk through little pathways but only one at a time! I'm pregnant and my belly knocked some stuff over today while I was over. Its very frustrating! I love her dearly and it has taken me years and years to try to understand why she does the things she does.

My husband says that she wasn't like that while he was still in the house. Before his parents got divorced it was always very clean. When they got divorced the stuff just crept in slowly until it has now avalanched! My husband is so afraid of it happening to our home that he constantly nags me about my little piles of clutter. I think what he doesn't realize is that my stuff is the normal clutter and will not turn into hoarding. I do see what he is scared of though and I need to be more sensitive to his feelings.

Her parents were hoarders too. I've heard that they were worse. She has other siblings that are hoarders and others that are neat freaks! Its quite interesting.

One of our kids keeps his room very neat while the other has little collections all over her room. We are afraid of her becoming like grandma. She keeps everything and when she is at school I have to go through her stuff and throw out the junk. Luckily she doesn't seem to notice everything. We don't need to be keeping cut up pieces of paper!

The other day at preschool, my son did a little collage with magazine photos. When asked why he cut out the photo of the inside of a new home, he replied that he "likes big empty houses without junk inside." It made me realize that as a preschooler he can see the difference between our home and Grandma's.

We are so concerned for my mother in law but I also realized that in order for her to trust me, I have to not judge her housekeeping skills and love the person that she is. Its so hard because we always talk about how we'd love to just haul it all away. Nobody can make her do it. Not even her kids or husband. Everytime I walk up and see the old plastic milk bottles (cracked and empty) I cringe. People might think she is "white trash" when they look in her yard but I know somebody else who cares deeply for her family as well. I also know that something inside her drives her to be like this. I know that someday we'll be cleaning it all up, most likely after she dies.

Re: Readers Digest: by Dakota on Tuesday, February 27, 2007 @ 03:55:19 ICT