I am compelled to
tell this story because I need to pour it out. I cannot as of yet
confront my mom and all the hurt she has caused so I will let it rush out
here...
Below is the result of your feedback form. It was submitted on Friday,
February 29th, 2008 at 07:20 AM.
Relationship : Daughter of a hoarder
Source : from a fellow youtuber
Message :
Tracy I have read your story. Ours stories are so similar I
felt compeled to write. Yes, hoarders make up elaborate excuses or
down right lies about how they live. My mom like your mother is well
liked, very much a people person and well respected. She knows most of the
town. But no one knows except us kids how bad it really is.
You would never be able to tell from meeting her the craziness in
which her and my father live. She is the hoarder and he is the enabler.
And I want to add really quickly that I am so glad to know others have
gone through and lived through this. I have never before meet so many
who have gone through the heartbreak of this disease.
My grandmother was
a hoarder, my aunt is a hoarder, and my mother is a hoarder. My
mother is by far the worst. My grandmother had what I term "dry clutter".
She had newspapers and things. Mostly newspapers but also quite a few
"things: clothes, shoes, old toothpaste tubes, empty tuna tins etc. My
mothers hoarding goes directly into filth. My dad has never to my
knowledge put his foot down. To anybody on the outside my mom is a sweet
nice person. To us that know on the inside she will fiercly defend her
junk and why it is important blah blah blah. And I mean with fire in
her eyes!
They both currently live in deplorable conditions. I have tried
several times to go over and help clean it out. I have suffered the really
bad lung wheezing and sinus pressure when I was stupid and tried to do
this without some form of a mask. My mom started hoarding when I was
7. I am now 32 and she has never stopped or slowed down. the mountains
get bigger, the paths get smaller and the rodents multiply, along
with the list of repairs that will never ever ever get done.
It is so
sad. I have felt priviledged to be able to talk about this to my fiance,
and my really close friends. I can tell by the look on their faces
that they really don't comprehend what I am saying, but they are there to
listen and it really helps. Tracy you have given me a glimps into the
future and it aint pretty. It is what I have been dreading all my
life. Confronting my mother on her mess before she dies in it and I am
left to clean up. We grew up with rotting food. she would visit the
store, buy the food and never put it away. it would sit in the bag and rot.
she would hoard everything from food, clothes, (garage sale and
resale shops) pets (cats) NEWSPAPERS!!! and magazines. when something broke
it never got fixed. ever. the shower broke. then the furnace. the
pipes burst because there was no heat. the electric was the last to go
all except one outlet in the upstairs bathroom. I am compelled to
tell this story because I need to pour it out. I cannot as of yet
confront my mom and all the hurt she has caused so I will let it rush out
here.
When I was 17 I ran off with a neighbor kid who suprizingly and
fatefully had a mother suffering from the same disease. I got pregnant
and got married shortly after. It did not work, was a horrible marriage
and it all ended 6 years ago. all to get away from the house I grew
up in. the horrors I could tell you echo what you never knew about your
mother. but i know and do not know how to stop it. We did recently
attended a clutter class at a local library. Guess what. It was packed!
more people attended than they had chairs for. My mom was in denial
the whole time. she claimed she only when to keep my other aunt (a non
hoarder) company. this aunt recently lost her husband and was trying
to find out how to part with his things. her home is not even
cluttered at all. during the meeting my mother freqently gave little stories
about what a clutter but HER mother was but never ever ever said anything
about the monster house that was hers.