...would the advice to stick it out for the sake of the child be the same? Somehow, I don't think so. I think Cary would have told the LW to detach with love and protect his son. Maybe even get the son into an Alateen program when it's age appropriate.

According to the Children of Hoarders website, children of hoarders share a lot of traits of children of alcoholics. And it would seem that hoarding, like alcoholism or other addictions, has both physical and emotional components.

I come from a family of "heavy clutterers" or perhaps hoarders (and a now-deceased alcoholic who was not a clutterer or hoarder). I fall into the clutterer category (and ACoA) and continually work on my own stuff (figuratively and literally).

The LW and his son need help in dealing with their spouse/mother's hoarding. Perhaps a healthy start to their own recovery would be to get out of that hellhole.