1/10/08: Dear Abby Column

COH & ACOA Joined: Jul 22, 2006 Posts: 2038 Location: Cabo

1/10/08
http://www.uexpress.com/dearabby/?uc_full_date=20080110
WOMAN'S DIRTY SECRET IS CAUSE FOR CONCERN ABOUT HER HEALTH

DEAR ABBY: I was recently called to come in to work at the grocery story where I am employed because my department manager, "Meg," didn't show up. After I finished the shift, I stopped by Meg's house to check on her. She didn't answer the door. Eventually a neighbor and I were able to enter her home and found her very ill. We called 911, and Meg was taken to the hospital. She's now in the ICU.

Meg is pretty much a loner, and her son lives in another state. In addition to my concern for her health, I was appalled by what I saw when we got inside her home. Abby, the place was filled with trash piled so deep we couldn't tell if there was any furniture. There was only a narrow pathway to her bedroom. A couple of space heaters were on, so I assume the furnace wasn't working. I also learned the police had to shut the water off because of a leak inside the house. It appears Meg was not having things repaired because she is hesitant to let anyone into her place.

It depresses me to know she lives in such deplorable conditions. I haven't been able to talk to anyone else at work about this, even though they, too, are concerned about Meg's illness. I can't imagine her returning to her home in the condition it's in. I'm sure she realizes that I've been in there, and I would imagine she's terribly embarrassed.

What should I say to her when she comes back to work, and what can I do to help her? -- TROUBLED IN COLORADO
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DEAR TROUBLED: The living conditions you have described are not only a danger to Meg's health, but also a serious fire hazard. All it would take is for any of the items piled on her floor to come in contact with one of the space heaters, and her place could become an inferno.

One way to help the woman would be to notify the health department and the fire department about the conditions you observed . Also, many hospitals have a social worker on staff , and another way to help Meg would be to quietly inform that person about the circumstances under which Meg was admitted to the hospital.

When she finally returns to work, all you should say is that you're glad she's back. Make no reference to what you saw, and I'm sure she won't either.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.[/b]

COH & ACOA Joined: Jul 22, 2006 Posts: 2038 Location: Cabo

By Abigail Van Buren
Tue Mar 18, 7:58 PM ET

DEAR ABBY: Your reply to the letter from "Troubled in Colorado" (Jan. 10), regarding "Meg," a compulsive hoarder, missed one important point. Hoarding is treatable. I am a code compliance officer and encounter these situations frequently.

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Hoarding is known by several other names -- Pack Rat Syndrome, collecting, etc. -- but it is considered to be a form of OCD, which is highly treatable once you convince the person to get treatment. Sufferers are usually aware they have a problem, but ashamed to let anyone know.

This problem crosses all social and economic boundaries. People with it are often highly intelligent, otherwise normal people. They just need help, and it is available. Many areas have support groups to help. -- JUDY JONES, MURIETTA, CALIF.

DEAR JUDY: Thank you for writing. Yes, as with many other problems, help is available -- if those who need it will only reach out. People with OCD can be helped through therapy, drugs, experts and organizations.

One such organization is the Obsessive Compulsive Foundation. It is best accessed through its Web site, www.ocfoundation.org. Its phone number is (617) 973-5801. It offers referrals to local groups across the United States. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: "Troubled in Colorado" should call her county social services office. Most states have a senior adult services office that could help the woman in that letter take care of her needs. Hoarding is often a sign of self-neglect, and that's something these officers often deal with. They can refer her to providers who can help her clean her place.

If she has a mental health issue, the senior services worker would also help her find counseling or a doctor to deal with her challenge in discarding things. -- C.R. MAHONEY, AGENCY ON AGING, CLEVELAND

DEAR READERS: FYI, your local Area Agency on Aging can be reached at (800) 677-1116 or at www.eldercare.gov, and has expertise in handling such matters.

DEAR ABBY: I'm responding to "Troubled in Colorado," who was trying to decide what to do about the poor living conditions she found in her sick co-worker's house. I work in a hospital, and what I have seen under similar circumstances is that EMS will report living conditions like the one she described to the receiving ER, which will likely get a case manager involved, along with treating the patient's medical problems. The woman sounds like she has significant OCD that needs to be addressed. -- R.G. IN CRANSTON, R.I.

DEAR ABBY: As a professional organizer for more than 10 years, I have seen it all. "Meg," the woman in that letter, is a hoarder, which can be caused by depression. Any professional organizer should be able to help her get organized. But she also needs professional help to get to the bottom of her depression. The condition of her house is a symptom of her problem, and any professional organizer who deals with hoarders can help her. -- LESLIE J., NEW BRITAIN, CONN.

DEAR ABBY: My sisters found me in similar circumstances. The dirty living quarters, not reaching out for help -- these are all too common among people with major depressive disorder. The past year has been difficult, but with the help of my family, my therapist and the right medication, I'm doing well. You were right, Abby, when you said "Troubled" needs to let the hospital know, so "Meg" can get the help she needs. -- DOING BETTER IN MILWAUKEE

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ucda/20080318/lf_ucda/helpforhoarderisavailablefrommanydifferentsources;_ylt=AhHLCNyiqiVX3ujv8tgLbJtxFb8C